Vistas of Hope: Journeys Through

End-of-Life and Bereavement

Welcome to Vistas of Hope.  This site is designed for those with interest in dying, death and bereavement.  It is for those who may be facing the death of a loved one or their own death, for those in the bereavement process, professionals looking for tools or the general public with an interest in these topics.
Dan Dixson is an ordained minister in the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ).  He has served as a pastor in faith communities in California, Idaho and Montana.  Feeling a special calling to serve those facing life crisis, he entered into hospital chaplaincy in 1998 and was the first Spiritual Care professional at Community Medical Center in Missoula, Montana.  During his 10 years there, Dan began to focus in end-of-life ministry and became a Certified Thanatologist with the Assoc. of Death Education and Counseling.   In 2007 he earned the designation of Board Certified Chaplain through the Assoc. of Professional Chaplains. That same year he moved to Lansing, Michigan to serve as Pastoral Care Supervisor at the Sparrow Health System.  In 2009, Dan was hired back to Missoula to serve as Chaplain and Grief Specialist with Partners In Home Care Hospice.  He retired from full time work in July of 2021 to become an educator and consultant in areas of end-of-life and bereavement. He has led workshops in many settings, including academic, professional, and for those with special needs or interests.  A list of workshops is available elsewhere in this site. 
This site will contain information gained from many professional sources as well s from Dan’s experiences as a pastor and as a chaplain in hospitals and hospice.  Feel free to contact him through this site with questions or specific concerns.     dixsond55@gmail.com

Dan’s Blog

CHILDREN AND FUNERALS The church I was pastoring in South Idaho lost a very prominent member. John was the kind of church member who didn’t have much money but he was always available to help fix whatever was broken and to be a strong voice for reason and simplicity. On the evening prior to his funeral in the church, we had the customary viewing at the church. Later in the evening I received a concerned call from his daughter. She said that their son, Peter, who was maybe 3 or 4 years old had a strange question when they got home from the viewing. He knew that his grandpa had died and he had been told that his grandpa had gone to be with Jesus. That left him with a very direct and simple question: “How come Jesus only took Grandpa’s legs and not the rest of him?” Great question, at least for this little boy’s developmental age. What do you see when you view a deceased person in an open casket? You see their head and upper torso. The bottom portion of the casket is generally closed. You don’t see their legs and feet, which led this boy to think only his legs got to go be with Jesus. The next morning, I met the family at the church so that I could open the whole casket so that the little guy could see that all of his grandpa’s body was there in one piece and only the soul or being of Jess had gone to heaven. God receives the essence of a grandpa and leaves us, the living, to deal with the body no longer needed. When I mentioned all of this to the funeral director, he apologized and when there were young children at a viewing, he nearly always at least asked family if they wanted him to open the entire lid for the child to see. There has been much research and writing around the subject of children and funerals. I can tell you that from my own reading and years of experience with funerals, I am a strong advocate for children being included in both funeral planning and the funeral itself. Of course, that must be done keeping several things in mind. Part of that is the relationship of the child to the deceased, sometimes the cause of death, and certainly the child or adolescent’s developmental understanding. A child the age of Peter is very concrete in their understanding of the world, of life and of death. What they see and are told has to pass through that concrete operational filter. That means that they need to be carefully prepared for what they will see and do and what others will be doing at the service as well. Their questions need to be taken very seriously and answered honestly and as directly as possible. Peter’s parents were wise enough to not discount his concern or give him some pat answer. They called to make sure we could address his question in a concrete way, which was to see all of his grandpa. If a parent or other adult working with a child through a funeral is not sure how to answer questions that come up, the funeral director or the officiant/minister are good resources for the parent or to speak directly with the child. That’s just one example of how adults can be sure to prepare a child for what they will see and experience as a part of the process of a viewing and funeral or memorial service. In a future article, I’ll address more about children and adolescents as pertains to issues of death, funerals and their grief needs.